Profile

Champion of children

Parenting potential

This is an extract from Soleira Green's new book
'The New Visionaries - evolutionary leadership for a vibrant world' www.newvisionaries.net/NewVisionaries

New Visionary # 5 - Alan Wilson
Champion of Children, UK
www.developyourchild.co.uk, www.theenergyalliance.com and www.alanwilson.info

I met Alan Wilson two years ago at the first 'Children of the New World Conference' in the UK. We were drawn inexplicably together across a crowded room, both of us having identified a wonderful potential that was filling the room. Today, two years on, we're great buddies, having travelled together through the UK, USA and Australia to make our visions a reality.

Ten years ago, Alan tells me he was a stressed out, materialistic, business owner, driven by money and success, with little time left for his family and kids. Two years ago, he was a renewed dad and a man with a vision to wholistically develop millions of children globally. At that time, he had two programmes to create self-esteem and confidence for children under his 'Develop Your Child' company to support that vision. Today, he's full of passion and possibility, a living example of the move from a man with a vision to a visionary who's working multi-faceted in a brilliant new way. In the past two years, he's:
nwritten and published a book entitled 'Listen to Your Children'
nhas a second collaborative book underway with experts on New
Kids all around the world (to be published fall 2006)
n developed four programmes for teachers and youth workers to
deliver and seven specialist programmes for coaches to deliver to
parents, carers, teachers, foster carers and other professionals
working with children
ninitiated a charity, the Develop Your Child Foundation,
nsponsored a radio show called 'NewKidsLive.com', hosted by a
young man who's one of our new kids
ninitiated a programme to take parent coaching into corporations
nfounded and runs 'The Energy Alliance', a global affiliation of
people who are working energetically in leading edge ways with
new kids
ntaught courses in communication skills for respectful relationships
in families as well as empowerment courses for a wide range of
parents including teenage mothers and foster carers
nbegun designing a vision for a new kind of school that supports
the new educational desires and passions of our new kids based
on exploring their innate abilities
ninitiated a new course called 'Parenting Potential' to support
parents in realising their children's full potential and to empower
fulfilled families
nworking in a school with teenagers, their parents, teachers and all
the support staff to create an ethos of respect and
empowerment and
norganised an international conference 'Kids are really different
these days' bringing together four leading edge pioneers, from
around the world to offer a breakthrough look at the new world of
children these days.

Alan is a new visionary who knows how to get things moving and who puts his passion for kids at the very top of his life priorities. I give you Alan Wilson, new visionary and champion of children.

"I didn't know when I became bankrupt in 1993, with a life dominated by material possessions and a drive for success, that I would end up where I am today. Thank goodness for bankruptcies and the like … events that force us to awaken from a very deep slumber.

All of a sudden the life I had was gone and the biggest challenge of that was facing myself as a failure. I was totally driven by ego back then and the ignominity of the failure drove me deeper into despair. Amazingly, this pushed me over the edge into a breakdown of sorts, but which I now call my biggest wake up call. It was then that I started to ask myself what life was all about. At the time, I know I was frightened about what the answers might be, but I look back now with a big grin and see how brilliant it's all turned out to be.

It's given me a second chance at life … and not just with my own kids as a dad, but as a person being able to realise my own potential and to help others, especially children, to realise theirs.

Like any dad, when your children are born, you're awed by these little beings that come in to your life. With all of my three kids, I was fully participative in feeding, changing, getting up in the middle of the night where I could and looking after these wonderful little beings. I've always loved my kids, as any parent would say. But during my married years, I didn't really take a lot of notice of the kids. I didn't engage with them as much because I was busy building the business and unfortunately at the time I didn't make them a high enough priority. I was always a good parent within my criteria … that's to say, after my divorce, when I only had my kids for one day a week or a weekend every other week, I did learn to apply myself purely to them. That's what's really changed I suppose. When I was first married, they weren't a high priority. When I was divorced they were a high priority when I had them. And now my life is dedicated to changing children's lives forever.

A second chance
Cassie, my third child from a second marriage, was a very big influence on this. I often refer to her as the reason that I'm doing this. When I think about it now I realise that I was so pleased to have a second chance to make up for the mistakes I'd made in my first family. My second marriage didn't last, but when I walked away from the marriage, I felt really bitter with myself that I couldn't make up for my earlier mistakes with Cassie. The breakthrough in our relationship as daughter and dad came when I took her on holiday for the first time to Majorca when she was 3 or 4. I started a diary called Cassie's Magic Moments, making this fabulous record of all the things she said and did on that holiday. I realised then that we had a very special relationship and that she wanted me as a dad. It was ok … I'd been given my second chance.

From then on everything became different. I started to repair myself and make it better with Cassie and me. Our relationship has blossomed and grown and maybe that's what's touched and sparked the visionary in me.

Unconditional love
It was like a big veil lifted off me. I had so desperately wanted to be a dad for her and despite all the circumstances with the divorce and the lack of opportunity to make up for my past failures, all of that was overcome by this little person's preparedness to give me another chance. It was seeing her in her magnificence and realising that this little person knew so much, that I knew I wanted to give every child that opportunity to have that feeling, the feeling of being unconditionally loved. Kids give it to us, but we don't always give it back to them and that's partly I think because blokes especially don't find that easy to do. And certainly for me, I didn't realise I hadn't loved myself all my life, until that point when someone was unconditionally loving me.

This unconditional love unleashed something in me. It was the desire to make things right for kids. And so I began, not knowing exactly where it would lead me. It certainly wasn't the traditional, successful route I'd had planned for my life. But all I can say today is thank goodness it's gone this way.

By 2002 I had the passion to wholistically develop millions of children (as whole beings) globally. Then last year, 2005, I wanted to create better family relationships with my focus more on parenting. And now today it's to create the right community environments for young people to blossom and grow into the wonderful creative individuals they are.

Connecting with a power beyond me
I'm not sure at what point I actually grew into being a visionary. It wasn't necessarily the moment I chose to do something for children. It's more likely when I started looking further a field from just the kids themselves, when I began to look into all the other influences (parents, teachers, peers, schools, education, etc.) that I became a visionary. I began to actively affect all those influencers to respect, listen and value these young people. I began to tap into a bigger picture and put my focus on supporting other people more. Not only does this take away our own issues and challenges, but it actually makes the whole thing ever so easy to do. It was here, operating beyond my own normal concerns for self, that I became more connected to and a part of the bigger picture and began to experience my own effect or influence on a power beyond me.

I'm still experiencing even now what this actually means and still asking myself questions about my responsibility to the world, to a bigger picture and to the collective. Again it's unconditional love for more than me, for a power beyond me that I'm connected to.

When I recognise that I'm connected to this power, then everything around me just changes and flows for what is a bigger purpose, which I'm part of, responsible to and finding my way towards. The more I do when I'm connected to this bigger power, the more creative and effective I become and everything is easy around me. This can be extraordinarily exciting and even a little uncomfortable at this stage of my growth.

So what is this power beyond me? I might call it the collective consciousness of all. It's where people of like minds or faith or trust are connected to take forward what wants to happen in the cosmos. We're all connected to that in some way or other. I guess the work I've done on myself over the last few years has enabled me to connect on a wider bandwidth, allowing me to tap into all that there is, to contribute my part of life's rich tapestry.

From this place, not only do you connect and empower other people, it's an incredible way of life and attracts equally awesome people. I can see that in the past, I've limited people by holding them in a smaller space and that hasn't served me, or them, well. But connected to this power beyond self, it seems you naturally attract wonderful people who are awesome in their own unique ways and they dive in to help and to contribute what they have to contribute with our shared visions.

Being a visionary is my life
Today I know my children are well looked after with fabulous mums and so I can focus a level of determination and commitment to the work that I'm about. It's what I can provide and what I want to provide to move the work onwards and forwards … the work being the fulfilment of that bigger picture of what we're all here to do. So today being a visionary is my life, in every aspect. It's not just something you do. It's not a job. It's a life purpose. It's who I'm now coming to be. I think being a visionary is an ongoing evolutionary process that seems to have endless, incredible breakthrough movements associated with it.

I seem to have had so many incredible ah ha's and life changing moments as well as profound experiences that have shaped my growth and the development of my work. It has all been from real life experiences, not from a research or book study point of view so much. It's more about getting out there, knowing what's working and what isn't and doing something about it. And that's actually what I've done. When I've found a gap, I've done something about it … and there seems to be an increasing number of gaps and creations to fulfil them. Maybe that's the step from having a vision, like a project that you work on sometimes, to living 24/7 as a visionary. If I have an idea and I believe it's right, I'll go out and do it. I make things happen along with some amazing, valuable, incredible support from some fantastic and awesome individuals. I love that about being a new visionary. There are so many others to play with to make it all happen with great fun and ease.

I've always had a good sense of humour and been able to laugh easily (mostly to myself or at myself). But life is so fantastically enjoyable as a new visionary that it takes joyful living to a whole new level. When you realise that you are creating your own reality, there's no one else to hide from. You stop putting your attention on yourself and start putting your attention on what really matters to you, to others and the world.

Signing on for the bigger game
I would recommend that others sign on for the bigger game and become a new visionary. They would need to suspend belief about themselves, understand the reality that they create around themselves and be able to unconditionally love themselves to connect with and empower others.

Two years ago I had a passion to wholistically develop children globally. Today my vision is to create community environments where young people can blossom and grow into the wonderful creative individuals that they are and where families can live whole and fulfilled. And when I look back on that initial vision now, whilst it was a passion, it appears empty by comparison to the energy of what I'm about today and it's almost frightening what is going to happen in the next two years. But I am up for it. I'm really excited about the potential and impact on young people and families everywhere."